Chapter 12: Years in My Master’s Hermitage
(Paramahamsa
Yogananda (Mukunda) has trouble with a mosquito and was irritated by it.)
A rude mosquito entered the idyl and
competed for my attention. As it dug a poisonous hypodermic needle into my
thigh, I automatically raised an avenging hand. Reprieve from impending
execution! An opportune memory came to me of one of Patanjali’s yoga
aphorisms—that on ahimsa(harmlessness).
“Why didn’t you finish the job?”
“Master! Do you advocate taking life?”
“No; but the deathblow already had
been struck in your mind.”
“I don’t understand.”
“Patanjali’s meaning was the removal
of desire to kill.” Sri Yukteswar had found my mental processes an open book.
“This world is inconveniently arranged for a literal practice of ahimsa. Man
may be compelled to exterminate harmful creatures. He is not under similar
compulsion to feel anger or animosity. All forms of life have equal right to
the air of maya. The saint who uncovers the secret of creation will be in
harmony with its countless bewildering expressions. All men may approach that
understanding who curb the inner passion for destruction.”
“Guruji, should one offer himself a
sacrifice rather than kill a wild beast?”
“No; man’s body is precious. It has
the highest evolutionary value because of unique brain and spinal centers.
These enable the advanced devotee to fully grasp and express the loftiest
aspects of divinity. No lower form is so equipped. It is true that one incurs
the debt of a minor sin if he is forced to kill an animal or any living thing.
But the Vedas teach that wanton loss of a human body is a serious transgression
against the karmic law.”
I sighed in relief; scriptural
reinforcement of one’s natural instincts is not always forthcoming.
(Mukunda
was sick and had lost his weight and had gone slim and weak)
“Medicines have limitations; the
creative life-force has none. Believe that: you shall be well and strong.”
--
Sri
Yukteshwar and Sri Lahiri Mahashaya
(Sri
Yukteshwar was once sick and so he approached his guru Sri Lahiri Mahashay)
“Years ago, I too was anxious to put on weight,” Sri Yukteswar told me. “During convalescence after a severe illness, I visited Lahiri Mahasaya in Benares.
“‘Sir, I have been very sick and lost many pounds.’
“‘I see, Yukteswar,9 you made yourself unwell, and now you think you are thin.’
“This reply was far from the one I had expected; my guru, however, added encouragingly:
“‘Let me see; I am sure you ought to feel better tomorrow.’
“Taking his words as a gesture of secret healing toward my receptive mind, I was not surprised the next morning at a welcome accession of strength. I sought out my master and exclaimed exultingly, ‘Sir, I feel much better today.’
“‘Indeed! Today you invigorate yourself.’
“‘No, master!’ I protested. ‘It was you who helped me; this is the first time in weeks that I have had any energy.’
“‘O yes! Your malady has been quite serious. Your body is frail yet; who can say how it will be tomorrow?’
“The thought of possible return of my weakness brought me a shudder of cold fear. The following morning I could hardly drag myself to Lahiri Mahasaya’s home.
“‘Sir, I am ailing again.’
“My guru’s glance was quizzical. ‘So! Once more you indispose yourself.’
“‘Gurudeva, I realize now that day by day you have been ridiculing me.’ My patience was exhausted. ‘I don’t understand why you disbelieve my truthful reports.’
“‘Really, it has been your thoughts that have made you feel alternately weak and strong.’ My master looked at me affectionately. ‘You have seen how your health has exactly followed your expectations. Thought is a force, even as electricity or gravitation. The human mind is a spark of the almighty consciousness of God. I could show you that whatever your powerful mind believes very intensely would instantly come to pass.’
“Knowing that Lahiri Mahasaya never spoke idly, I addressed him with great awe and gratitude: ‘Master, if I think I am well and have regained my former weight, shall that happen?’
“‘It is so, even at this moment.’ My guru spoke gravely, his gaze concentrated on my eyes.
“Lo! I felt an increase not alone of strength but of weight. Lahiri Mahasaya retreated into silence. After a few hours at his feet, I returned to my mother’s home, where I stayed during my visits to Benares.
“‘My son! What is the matter? Are you swelling with dropsy?’ Mother could hardly believe her eyes. My body was now of the same robust dimensions it had possessed before my illness.
“I weighed myself and found that in one day I had gained fifty pounds; they remained with me permanently. Friends and acquaintances who had seen my thin figure were aghast with wonderment. A number of them changed their mode of life and became disciples of Lahiri Mahasaya as a result of this miracle.
“My guru, awake in God, knew this world to be nothing but an objectivized dream of the Creator. Because he was completely aware of his unity with the Divine Dreamer, Lahiri Mahasaya could materialize or dematerialize or make any change he wished in the cosmic vision.
--
“All creation is governed by law,” Sri
Yukteswar concluded. “The ones which manifest in the outer universe,
discoverable by scientists, are called natural laws. But there are subtler laws
ruling the realms of consciousness which can be known only through the inner
science of yoga. The hidden spiritual planes also have their natural and lawful
principles of operation. It is not the physical scientist but the fully
self-realized master who comprehends the true nature of matter. Thus Christ was
able to restore the servant’s ear after it had been severed by one of the
disciples.”
--
(Sri
Yukteshwar ji reading Mukunda’s mind)
Sri Yukteswar was a peerless interpreter of the scriptures. Many of my happiest memories are centered in his discourses. But his jeweled thoughts were not cast into ashes of heedlessness or stupidity. One restless movement of my body, or my slight lapse into absent-mindedness, sufficed to put an abrupt period to Master’s exposition.
“You are not here.” Master interrupted
himself one afternoon with this disclosure. As usual, he was keeping track of
my attention with a devastating immediacy.
“Guruji!” My tone was a protest. “I
have not stirred; my eyelids have not moved; I can repeat each word you have
uttered!”
“Nevertheless you were not fully with
me. Your objection forces me to remark that in your mental background you were
creating three institutions. One was a sylvan retreat on a plain, another on a
hilltop, a third by the ocean.”
Those vaguely formulated thoughts had
indeed been present almost subconsciously. I glanced at him apologetically.
“What can I do with such a master, who
penetrates my random musings?”
“You have given me that right. The
subtle truths I am expounding cannot be grasped without your complete
concentration. Unless necessary I do not invade the seclusion of others’ minds.
Man has the natural privilege of roaming secretly among his thoughts. The
unbidden Lord does not enter there; neither do I venture intrusion.”
“You are ever welcome, Master!”
“Your architectural dreams will
materialize later. Now is the time for study!”
--
“A man of realization does not perform
any miracle until he receives an inward sanction,” Master explained. “God does
not wish the secrets of His creation revealed promiscuously.12 Also,
every individual in the world has inalienable right to his free will. A saint
will not encroach upon that independence.”
“Even when Lahiri Mahasaya was
silent,” Master told me, “or when he conversed on other than strictly religious
topics, I discovered that nonetheless he had transmitted to me ineffable
knowledge.”
“The darkness of maya is
silently approaching. Let us hie homeward within.” With these words at dusk
Master constantly reminded his disciples of their need for Kriya Yoga. A
new student occasionally expressed doubts regarding his own worthiness to
engage in yoga practice.
“Forget the past,” Sri Yukteswar would
console him. “The vanished lives of all men are dark with many shames. Human
conduct is ever unreliable until anchored in the Divine. Everything in future
will improve if you are making a spiritual effort now.”
Sri Yukteswar’s health was excellent;
I never saw him unwell.14 He
permitted students to consult doctors if it seemed advisable. His purpose was
to give respect to the worldly custom: “Physicians must carry on their work of
healing through God’s laws as applied to matter.” But he extolled the
superiority of mental therapy, and often repeated: “Wisdom is the greatest
cleanser.”
“The body is a treacherous friend.
Give it its due; no more,” he said. “Pain and pleasure are transitory; endure
all dualities with calmness, while trying at the same time to remove their
hold. Imagination is the door through which disease as well as healing enters.
Disbelieve in the reality of sickness even when you are ill; an unrecognized
visitor will flee!”
Sri Yukteswar’s wisdom was so
penetrating that, heedless of remarks, he often replied to one’s unspoken
observation. “What a person imagines he hears, and what the speaker has really
implied, may be poles apart,” he said. “Try to feel the thoughts behind the
confusion of men’s verbiage.”
“I am hard on those who come for my
training,” he admitted to me. “That is my way; take it or leave it. I will
never compromise. But you will be much kinder to your disciples; that is your
way. I try to purify only in the fires of severity, searing beyond the average
toleration. The gentle approach of love is also transfiguring. The inflexible
and the yielding methods are equally effective if applied with wisdom. You will
go to foreign lands, where blunt assaults on the ego are not appreciated. A
teacher could not spread India’s message in the West without an ample fund of
accommodative patience and forbearance.”
New disciples often joined Sri
Yukteswar in exhaustive criticism of others. Wise like the guru! Models of
flawless discrimination! But he who takes the offensive must not be
defenceless. The same carping students fled precipitantly as soon as Master
publicly unloosed in their direction a few shafts from his analytical quiver.
“Tender inner weaknesses, revolting at
mild touches of censure, are like diseased parts of the body, recoiling before
even delicate handling.” This was Sri Yukteswar’s amused comment on the flighty
ones.
A worthy leader has the desire to serve, and not to dominate. (Sri
Yuteshwar ji explains this to Kumar, a new, young and bright student of his)
Sri Yukteshwar’s love for Kumar
and his decision to renounce him as he did not accept the disapproval of his
guru about going to his home village resulted in destroying his spiritual life.
“Mukunda, I will leave it to you to instruct Kumar to leave the ashram
tomorrow; I can’t do it!” Tears stood in Sri Yukteswar’s eyes, but he
controlled himself quickly. “The boy would never have fallen to these depths
had he listened to me and not gone away to mix with undesirable companions. He
has rejected my protection; the callous world must be his guru still.”
“Keen intelligence is two-edged,” Master once remarked in reference to
Kumar’s brilliant mind. “It may be used constructively or destructively like a
knife, either to cut the boil of ignorance, or to decapitate one’s self.
Intelligence is rightly guided only after the mind has acknowledged the
inescapability of spiritual law.”
Sri Yukteshwar ji on Women and
Sex
My guru mixed freely with men and women disciples, treating all as his
children. Perceiving their soul equality, he showed no distinction or
partiality.
“In sleep, you do not know whether you are a man or a woman,” he said.
“Just as a man, impersonating a woman, does not become one, so the soul,
impersonating both man and woman, has no sex. The soul is the pure, changeless
image of God.”
Sri Yukteswar never avoided or blamed women as objects of seduction.
Men, he said, were also a temptation to women. I once inquired of my guru why a
great ancient saint had called women “the door to hell.”
“A girl must have proved very troublesome to his peace of mind in his
early life,” my guru answered causticly. “Otherwise he would have denounced,
not woman, but some imperfection in his own self-control.”
If a visitor dared to relate a suggestive story in the hermitage, Master
would maintain an unresponsive silence. “Do not allow yourself to be thrashed
by the provoking whip of a beautiful face,” he told the disciples. “How can
sense slaves enjoy the world? Its subtle flavors escape them while they grovel
in primal mud. All nice discriminations are lost to the man of elemental
lusts.”
Students seeking to escape from the dualistic maya delusion received
from Sri Yukteswar patient and understanding counsel.
“Just as the purpose of eating is to satisfy hunger, not greed, so the
sex instinct is designed for the propagation of the species according to
natural law, never for the kindling of insatiable longings,” he said. “Destroy
wrong desires now; otherwise they will follow you after the astral body is torn
from its physical casing. Even when the flesh is weak, the mind should be
constantly resistant. If temptation assails you with cruel force, overcome it
by impersonal analysis and indomitable will. Every natural passion can be
mastered.
“Conserve your powers. Be like the capacious ocean, absorbing within all
the tributary rivers of the senses. Small yearnings are openings in the
reservoir of your inner peace, permitting healing waters to be wasted in the
desert soil of materialism. The forceful activating impulse of wrong desire is
the greatest enemy to the happiness of man. Roam in the world as a lion of
self-control; see that the frogs of weakness don’t kick you around.”
The devotee is finally freed from all instinctive compulsions. He
transforms his need for human affection into aspiration for God alone, a love
solitary because omnipresent.
Even a great saint cannot teach
his parents
Sri Yukteswar’s mother lived in the Rana Mahal district of Benares where
I had first visited my guru. Gracious and kindly, she was yet a woman of very
decided opinions. I stood on her balcony one day and watched mother and son
talking together. In his quiet, sensible way, Master was trying to convince her
about something. He was apparently unsuccessful, for she shook her head with
great vigor.
“Nay, nay, my son, go away now! Your wise words are not for me! I am not
your disciple!”
Sri Yukteswar backed away without further argument, like a scolded child. I was touched at his great respect for his mother even in her unreasonable moods. She saw him only as her little boy, not as a sage. There was a charm about the trifling incident; it supplied a sidelight on my guru’s unusual nature, inwardly humble and outwardly unbendable.
“To seek the Lord, one need not disfigure his face,” he would remark.
“Remember that finding God will mean the funeral of all sorrows.”
A noted chemist once crossed swords with Sri Yukteswar. The visitor
would not admit the existence of God, inasmuch as science has devised no means
of detecting Him.
“So you have inexplicably failed to isolate the Supreme Power in your
test tubes!” Master’s gaze was stern. “I recommend an unheard-of experiment.
Examine your thoughts unremittingly for twenty-four hours. Then wonder no
longer at God’s absence.”
Sri Yukteshwar ji on reading
scriptures
(A pundit left after giving many references from scriptures. Sri
Yukteshwar had asked is he digested the timeless teachings and the pundit
replied – I have no inner realization and left. After the pundit left) -
“These bloodless pedants smell unduly of the lamp,” my guru remarked
after the departure of the chastened one. “They prefer philosophy to be a
gentle intellectual setting-up exercise. Their elevated thoughts are carefully
unrelated either to the crudity of outward action or to any scourging inner
discipline!”
Master stressed on other occasions the futility of mere book learning.
“Do not confuse understanding with a larger vocabulary,” he remarked.
“Sacred writings are beneficial in stimulating desire for inward realization,
if one stanza at a time is slowly assimilated. Continual intellectual study
results in vanity and the false satisfaction of an undigested knowledge.”
Source: https://anandaindia.org/paramhansa-yogananda/autobiography-of-a-yogi/years-in-my-masters-hermitage/
Introduction: https://anandaindia.org/paramhansa-yogananda/autobiography-of-a-yogi/
